An Understanding of Love
by scribblings02
Summary: What will the future hold for the new star and her director? Set after the Season One finale of SMASH. #Cartwills (I haven't been able to get on my other account but wanted to start updating this story again so I've copied and pasted the first few chapters from my first account and made a new account but this is the same initial author of this story! )
1. After the Show

_And please, let me be. Let me be your star!_

Karen's voice soared over the already cheering crowd, she held her breath as she was applauded and held her pose as the curtains drew to a close, their velvet lining blocking the bright spotlight from her eyes. The brunette relaxed and was enveloped by the entire cast and crew, every single one offering congratulations and praise. Looking around though, Karen couldn't see the one person she had been thinking about all day, the one person who had stuck by her and had faith in her through everything, Derek. When she couldn't find him anywhere near the stage, she was forced back into the spotlight for the final curtain call. Disappointed that she didn't get to see him she faked a grin and bowed for her fans.

"Iowa, you were amazing." Jessica gushed as soon as Karen entered the wings where her friends had been hiding.

"Thanks you guys, I couldn't have done it without all of your support." And Derek's she thought to herself.

"Uhm, have you- have you by any chance seen Derek around?" she whispered coyly.

"OMG I was right, you owe me a twenty." Bobby fawned holding out his hand to Jessica.

Grunting, she placed a twenty dollar bill in his hand and glared daggers at him but Bobby just began laughing, both of them turned their attentions back to a confused Karen who was still wondering where Derek was.

"The Darklord left right after eye-raping you from stage left. He had to do a few things with Eileen but he said he'd be at the after party." Bobby answered her, a smirk playing on his lips.

Karen blushed at the implications that they were both suggesting to her. Honestly, she didn't know what was going on between her and Derek, it was part of the reason why she wanted to find him, but she also knew that she wanted to find him to feel safe again. After the whole situation with Dev, Karen found it hard to trust anyone but Derek made her feel at home, he made her feel safe. His words had been playing in her head non-stop since he had uttered them to her ' I do understand love.' How could four small words have such a big effect on her?

Karen got dressed into her usual tights, loose shirt, leather jacket and boots to go to the bar close to the theatre where everyone was for the official 'Bombshell' after party. She found herself tugging at the end of her leather jacket and tried to stop herself but she was nervous to see Derek again, excited but nervous. What if he didn't like the show? What if her performance wasn't good enough? a million 'what if's' circled around in her head.

"Iowa? Iowa? KAREN!" Sam yelled pulling her out of her thoughts.

"Huh? What?" She whispered, still distracted with thoughts of a certain director.

"Quit thinking about Derek and come on, we're already late and you're the star." he laughed grabbing her arm and running the rest of the way.

Once inside, The overture from the show played and a spotlight once again landed on Karen.

"CONGRATULATIONS!" everyone shouted, the lights were flashing and cameras started to click as Karen laughed and thanked everyone.

When the crowd let her go, she found herself drifting towards the bar and ordering a scotch on the rocks. She was exhausted and needed something to take her mind off of all the questions attacking her brain.

"Bit strong for you, don't you think love?" Karen knew who it was instantly, she could hear the sarcasm and amusement drenching his voice in a way that made her want to just melt into him.

"Derek," she whispered, swivelling her bar chair to face the bemused heartthrob. He smiled at her and hugged her.

"You were a star tonight, darling." he whispered in her ear, making her in return hug him tighter she didn't want to ruin the moment but she desperately needed answers, she needed to know where they stood because so far it had been a very confusing saga of events that summed up to no solid conclusion.

"Derek we have to talk.." she said, giving him a smile to make sure he knew it wasn't about anything terribly serious.

"I know, love. Coffee back in the hotel?" he asked extending his arm like the british gentleman that he was.


	2. Karen and Derek, Derek and Karen?

Karen followed him out, taking his arm as they walked through the bustling streets of Boston, it was no New York but the excitement from opening night still danced in both of their eyes. Karen was finding it difficult to keep up with Derek's 'london walk' but managed to keep her pace until they got to the hotel. The warmth of the hotel lobby was welcome to the couple who's noses were slightly red from the nippy weather outside, Derek lead Karen to one of the tables and took her coat as she sat down.

"Thanks," Karen whispered as he sat himself down across from her.

She couldn't help but stare at him, he was gorgeous not that she didn't know that already but she was just unfolding this new side of the big-shot Broadway director. He ordered two martinis for them, oblivious to the flirtatious looks that the waitress was giving him consecutively earning a feeling of jealousy from Karen.

"What did you want to talk about, darling?" Derek asked as the menus were taken away, Karen could feel her heart beating through her fingertips, as she shakily tapped them on the hardwood of the table. _Might as well get it over with, Karen _she thought to herself.

"Wh- what did you mean," she started, her voice revealing the nervousness in her head. When she saw confusion grace his features, she took a deep breath and started again.

"What did you mean when you said that you understand love?" she whispered, staring deep into his forest green eyes.

Derek looked at Karen, she was beautiful, still so sweet and innocent even after the huge amounts of pressure everyone- including himself had forced on her. She looked absolutely petrified while asking a question that he thought would be an obvious answer. He loved her. He had loved the woman since the first time he had laid eyes on her, and when she was finally given the recognition that she deserved on the stage that he created playing the part that she was meant for he couldn't be prouder.

"Darling, I think you know why I said those 4 words before you went on that stage" he whispered lowly so that only she could hear him, genuinely giving her a smile.

Karen took an audible deep breath as he continued, making it obvious that she was thinking something completely different to what Derek had tried to imply, weighing down his options on what he could do in the heat of the moment he sighed, Karen was worth the risk and he had waited long enough for this. Standing up in one swift motion he stepped to the other side of the table and helped the gorgeous brunette to her feet, lightly tracing a finger down her cheek he leant down and kissed her- both of their emotions were heavily weighing down on the kiss and he was nervous. What if he had made a huge mistake? What if she didn't feel the same way?

Karen was shocked, Derek was kissing her. Derek Wills was kissing her. She was pulled out of her head and realised that she wasn't making it up, Derek was in fact kissing her. She slowly wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him back, never wanting to let go. She never would have believed that Derek actually felt something for her, dreamed yes. But in real life? never. When they both broke free for air they just stood there, grinning like idiots happy just to be with each other.

"I had no idea.. you-" Karen wanted to ask him even more questions but her voice just wouldn't follow her brain.

"I'm just really happy." she whispered, her cheeks blushing like crazy instantly giving her away.

Derek stood there and just watched the beautiful woman in front of him try and figure out what to say, she was portraying exactly what he was feeling inside. He didn't know what to say, he was just awestruck on the acceptance that she had given him of his implied feelings.

"As am I, love." he whispered back, kissing her cheek as he went back to his side of the table. As he sat down he felt his phone buzz and Tom's picture came up for the caller ID.

He put the phone on speaker and answered: "Yes, Tom?" he asked the annoyance coating his voice.

"Derek. It's Ivy. You and Karen need to come to the hospital, now." Tom said, he sounded frazzled and nervous, before Derek could ask what had happened the phone line cut and the new couple were forced to helplessly wonder what had happened.

"Derek, we have to go.." Karen said, worry filling her eyes, Derek left some cash on the table, put his arms around a teary-eyed Karen and lead them out the door to find out more about what had happened to Ivy Lynn..

**AN: I was so happy to see the reviews that were left from the first chapter! I'm really loving writing this story so far and I'd love to hear any input from all of you! Also, I'm sorry to leave you in a cliffhanger but I think it's necessary for the chapter that's coming up :) Derek and Karen are just adorable. #Cartwillsforever**


	3. Poisoned Ivy

The drive to the hospital was quiet, Karen and Derek were both consumed in thoughts of Ivy. It was a pleasant silence though, they felt comfortable in the quiet that they shared. Once they got up to 'Boston Medical' they parked the car and rushed in still holding hands. Derek spoke first, running up to the front desk

"We're here for Ivy Lynn," he practically yelled at the nurse.

"Are you family?" the startled woman asked, she was obviously new to the hospital and wasn't quite used to answering to frantic directors.

Karen picked up on this and squeezed Derek's hand lightly before taking over. "Yes, I'm her sister." she whispered to the nurse. She figured a little white lie wouldn't hurt considering the situation.

"Oh in that case, she's in surgery but the rest of your family is in the waiting room, I'll take you to them." the nurse said, dodging Derek's hard gaze but smiling slightly at Karen.

The couple followed the nurse to the waiting area where they saw Tom, Sam, Julia and Eileen waiting seated together.

"I'll have the doctor come in to give you an update," the nurse said to Karen. Earning nods from everyone.

"What happened, Tom?" Derek asked, letting go of Karen and sitting next to the sobbing composer.

"I don't know, they haven't told me anything- I walked into the dressing room after the show to look for her and I saw her on the floor with a container of pills in her hand.." he said lowly so that other people in the waiting room wouldn't hear. Karen was next to Julia across from Tom and Derek, and upon hearing what had taken place with Ivy she burst into tears.

"This is all my fault.." she sobbed into Julia who held her close.

"Honey, none of this is your fault. You did nothing wrong, we should have known that there was something wrong with Ivy…" Julia said trying to calm her down, when that didn't work she simply hugged her and soothingly rubbed her back.

Derek hadn't noticed what was happening until he saw Julia hugging Karen, her back was shaking with tears. Instantly he came to her side and took her into his lap.

"Oh darling, what's wrong?" he asked wrapping his arms around her tiny frame.

"It's my fault D-Derek, I took Marilyn from her and now you.." she cried into his shoulder. "I'm a monster." she continued shaking her head.

"Sweetheart you did absolutely nothing wrong. She didn't get the part because she wasn't as good as you, and you can't take something that she never had, love. It's not possible. If anything _she _borrowed me from you because from where I see it, I've always been yours Karen Cartwright."

Derek's little speech had everyone else in the little group in awe, Karen Cartwright had done the inevitable- she'd melted the heart of the Darklord.

"Karen you've done what I've been trying to do for 10 years in one performance. It's incredible." Eileen exclaimed, voicing what everyone else was thinking.

Derek sent daggers to everyone else in the room but softened at the sight of Karen wrapping her arms around his neck and wresting her head on his chest. He came to the conclusion that he had everything that he could possibly need right there in his arms. He was completely in love with the gorgeous brunette and once this was over he intended on showing her just how much he loved her in as many ways as he could.

Derek's thoughts were interrupted by the sudden appearance of the doctor.

"Are you all family?" he asked, in disbelief.

"I'm her brother." Tom stated, everyone had their best poker faces on for the obvious lie that he had just told knowing that this was the only way they would be able to get some information on what was happening to Ivy. The doctor hesitantly nodded and started his report.

"Well, your sister had taken a very large amount of Alprazolam when you found her, when you found her the drugs had already been administered into her system so the ENT's were forced to pump her stomach. Most of it was retrieved but damage may have still been done to her internal organs, she's out of surgery and recovering but with the amount that she took, we are going to have to prescribe Ms. Lynn with a few months of rehab. We'd also like to keep her in for a few days to monitor her."

Everyone was taken back, they knew that Ivy had been taking something for her anxiety- especially with her mother being in town just before they left for Boston but they never thought that she would go this far. Tom broke the silence;

"C-Can we see her?" he asked, nervously holding Karen's hand. They were all standing up in a big group surrounding the doctor.

"Yes, you can. She's in room 346" the doctor stated. "Once you've seen her though, we're going to have to discuss your sister's rehabilitation plans." he added, looking at Tom.

Tom nodded and the group made their way to the room where Ms. Lynn was recovering. The room was small, the only furniture in it was a small sofa and a hospital bed, and there in the center of the whole room was Ivy- hooked up to a million different machines that monitored everything.

"Well if it isn't the bitch who stole my part and the director she loves.." Ivy whispered angrily.

**AN:I wonder what the angry little blonde is gonna try to pull on Karen in the next chapter. Is Derek going to let her hurt his star? I hope you guys liked the chapter, not much happened but it's more of a filler for the next one and a few fluffy moments with Derek and Karen. Let me know what you think, and also what you want to see more of in the story! I've been loving reading the reviews from the first two chapters :)**


	4. Facing Hurricane Ivy

**Hey lovelies! I'm back with a new chapter for you all having just regained my cartwills muse! I'd love to hear your thoughts so send in those reviews! **

At Ivy's cold words, Karen backed off a little, getting closer to Derek out of both fear and respect for Ivy's space during that time. "Maybe I should.." she whispered, motioning towards the door and making to move out before her arm was caught by Derek who pulled her back into his arms.

"You're staying right where you are, love." he murmured against her ear, wrapping his arms protectively around her so that they were both prepared for what Ivy would inevitably have in store for the next hour.

Tom spoke first, stepping forward and getting close to the blonde patient, the pain of what she did obviously still in the front of his mind as he approached her.

"And they have you on their side now, why am I not surprised?" Ivy said icily, glaring at Tom and almost daring him to come any closer. "Don't you dare come any closer if all you're going to do is take their side, Tom. Because I don't want to hear it." she spat angrily, the snarl of pain and hurt echoing in her voice.

"That's enough Ivy. This is not Karen's, Derek's or Tom's fault. It's yours. You did this to yourself and you did it of your own accord, no one forced you to do it and you have the gall to just lounge around here in this hospital room playing dictator?" Everyone was surprised to say the least at Julia's sudden outburst but somehow, it woke Tom up and made him step forward, a new air of confidence hanging around him.

"Ivy you don't even care that you almost died? For what? To take away the pain of not getting a part? Everyone goes through the same to make it big on broadway. You of all people should know that." Tom said sternly, facing Ivy and looking her in the eye, not wanting to beat around the bush this time.

"Everyone!? Everyone Tom? Really? Why don't we ask the beautiful Miss Cartwright, that's right- the one over there cozying up to our esteemed director. She hasn't had to work for a day in her life. All she did was turn up and bat those eyelashes at him and she magically turns into Marilyn." Ivy retaliated bitterly, glaring daggers at Karen.

"Ivy." Tom said lowly, meaning for it to be a warning before she went any further with her accusations towards Karen.

"No Tom, she doesn't deserve this. She has my life! And the minute I do something and try to steal a piece of her life from her, this happens and the world is against me!" she continued, a fiery passion flaring in her eyes.

Derek had taken a step forward, ready to give Ivy a talking to about watching her mouth while talking about Karen but the mild mannered brunette stopped him, holding him back and stepping forward in his place. "Ivy, I know we've never been friends and God knows after this we probably never will be but I don't have anything to apologize to you for, I didn't do anything to intentionally hurt you, I've never tried to steal anything or anyone from you and I will never say I'm sorry for something that I am quite proud of. You're talented, Ivy. You're talented and clever but when it comes to personality and kindness you have some kind of extreme deficiency. I love Derek, you probably feel the same way considering the way you're lashing out but trust me when I say you'll have to kill me before you take away my happiness again, I also love Marilyn- the part is amazing and it makes me feel good to be able to sing it, another thing I would never let you take away from me again.. so if I were you I would embrace what's happening to you right now because you need to get better mentally and emotionally, I don't know how you're going to do it but I have a feeling you'll be fine and that all the self-pity you thrive on, won't do you any good." Karen scolded, turning on her heel and moving towards the door of the hospital room.

"Oh, and Ivy? Thank you. If you hadn't slept with Dev, I wouldn't be with the amazing man I am with today." she whispered, smiling softly at the shocked faces of the creative team including Derek, and the even angrier face of Ivy Lynn.


End file.
